boxofdelights

I participated in one of these years ago, with a group of people I didn't know well. I don't remember if there were guidelines up front about the gifts. I gave a small functional ceramic item (pitcher? bowl?) from the stash of things I made. I don't know if the recipient liked it, but it seemed appropriate to the general level of gifts.

I came home with a swirly glass paperweight type thing that I really like and still display. I debated the social dynamics of stealing it, and felt that the prior owner was very disappointed that I did so. If I had continued socializing with that group, there might have been fallout from that.

On top of anxiety about gifts, there's potential anxiety about wanting, greed, winning, social hierarchy, etc. I'm just as glad not to have participated in a white elephant party in a long time! It seems like part of the point is inducing uncomfortable tensions.

On the other hand, I've happily participated in swaps where people bring (nice) things they no longer want and place them unwrapped in the middle of the room for people to take turns choosing from. I've given art pieces I wouldn't otherwise have known what to do with, and gotten a skirt I still wear occasionally.